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 Hachimitsu no Kissu Plotting (Private) UPDATED!

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PostSubject: Re: Hachimitsu no Kissu Plotting (Private) UPDATED!   Mon Mar 19, 2012 8:34 am

Makes perfect sense to me.

That's what I was afraid of, losing a bunch of the character development and having the characters all merge together.
I'm wondering if I should introduce Ran and Umeko in chapter one, along with Umeko's family (her father and brother) and pretty much leave it at that.
I could essentially just focus on Ran and Umeko for the first little bit, like 3 chapters or so and then introduce other characters later.
I was rereading Sailor Moon to get some ideas and I realized that Usagi was there by herself for a chapter then came Ami, Rei, Makoto and then they were together for a while and THEN Minako came in. XD
So I kind of just want a slower pace... kind of ... thingie.. XD haha
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PostSubject: Re: Hachimitsu no Kissu Plotting (Private) UPDATED!   Mon Mar 19, 2012 9:04 am

Hm... I think this requires a kind of delicate balance, cuz if each character is introduced one at a time, you also run the risk of people thinking it wasnt planned out beforehand and youre just randomly placing characters there for the sake of putting more people there. You know, kinda like what happens mostly in shounen stories (like.. bleach, after the first arc. I felt like the author was continuing just because it HAD to continue.. like, new boss! After that, I didnt understand what the point of the whole story was anymore)

just what I think.

Really, it depends on a lot of things.

If the pace is too slow, people get bored, if it's too fast, others cant keep up.

I wish i knew a professional to give us advice... :<
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PostSubject: Re: Hachimitsu no Kissu Plotting (Private) UPDATED!   Mon Mar 19, 2012 9:11 am

I wish I did as well....
Are there any other mangas you really like that we could look at for examples?
In Barajou no Kiss all 5 main characters were introduced in the first chapter...
Starts with Anise, goes to Kaede, then Tsubasa, Mutsuki and Tenjou or whatever their names are /brick'd
; ___; maybe we should just look at a bunch of manga and get a feel for what we like best? What will work and what won't?
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PostSubject: Re: Hachimitsu no Kissu Plotting (Private) UPDATED!   Mon Mar 19, 2012 9:36 am

Well, I wouldnt even THINK of trying to put ALL the characters in at once. that's just.. overkill. since there's 15+ characters.

hm..... alrighty then

As stated before:
Ouran - 7 characters?
Fruits basket - 4 characters?? but it does mention that there are 12 animals, though theyre not explicitly introduced
once piece - basically, one character at a time. With naruto, it's almost the same, but characters appear and interact before they're really given some background, or there's a special arc with them.. i guess this worked well, since Naruto was basically shunned
Tsubasa - there were quite a lot of characters, but mostly everyone is familar with the majority of them already, so i dont think the same problem is there
SA - really confused me. I couldnt tell who was who for a long time. especially because their "introduction" was just a face, name, and rank.
zetsubou sensei - gradual introduction
yamato nadeshiko ni shichihenge - ~5 characters

I cant remember that many more off the top of my head right now

Most stories i've read only have 3~5 characters total. that keep appearing. but then, i read a lot of shoujo, so it's like... main chara, love interest, rival, (maybe a best friend or 2..)
I think there's definitely a max of 5-7 characters. I dont think Ive seen more than that being introduced at once.
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PostSubject: Re: Hachimitsu no Kissu Plotting (Private) UPDATED!   Mon Mar 19, 2012 10:55 am

Hmm. Alright
i'm also going to look at Madoka Magica a little bit as well and hopefully get some ideas from there.
Umeko doesn't figure out or become Heishi Moon until a while in, so it's important to have a good, strong plot nonetheless.
Madoka Magica is similar in that sense, where Madoka doesn't become a magical until later into the series.
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PostSubject: Re: Hachimitsu no Kissu Plotting (Private) UPDATED!   Mon Mar 19, 2012 11:04 am

ooh. I havent seen the whole series yet... >_< only remember the yellow girl with guns and those creepers

Hope you figure it out soon.. sorry im not much help
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PostSubject: Re: Hachimitsu no Kissu Plotting (Private) UPDATED!   Mon Mar 19, 2012 12:14 pm

No worries~! C: i'm sure i will figure it out for sure <3
Thanks for the input!

Oh, by the way, my friend Ciara is interested in helping
I think she might be able to help with animals c:
She's going to practice some of them and then we'll see~ : D
I told her to make an account on here so we could all talk with relative ease.
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PostSubject: Re: Hachimitsu no Kissu Plotting (Private) UPDATED!   Mon Mar 19, 2012 12:49 pm

cool, cool Very Happy
can't wait to meet her~
it's great that more people seem interested in helping. :3
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PostSubject: Re: Hachimitsu no Kissu Plotting (Private) UPDATED!   Mon Mar 19, 2012 6:03 pm

I think i might put this through a full revamp > u>
SO~ Don't work on anything just yet until I give you all the info! C: <3
Well.. you can work on stuff, like character sketches and what not, but since volume one is changing
i need to change the cover of it (probably going to make it more simple for you) and finish the script for chapter one in the very least. <3
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PostSubject: Re: Hachimitsu no Kissu Plotting (Private) UPDATED!   Mon Mar 19, 2012 6:35 pm

okaaay :3

I guess it's time for a Bakuman quote? ;D

...too bad my memory isnt that great, and I dont really have the time tonight to rewatch the series (which I have downloaded and am planning to rewatch sometime )

Work on your story as much as you need to, until youre happy with it ^x^ Until then, i'll just be practicing
- and writing my pharmacoeconomics paper



This is so cute!! <3

And yes, I have randomly googled the project
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PostSubject: Re: Hachimitsu no Kissu Plotting (Private) UPDATED!   Tue Mar 20, 2012 11:37 pm

AHhaha~! OMGOSH YOU FOUND IT~
<333333 My logo~ I'm so proud of it! <3
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PostSubject: Re: Hachimitsu no Kissu Plotting (Private) UPDATED!   Wed Mar 21, 2012 6:59 am

:3

Soooo
the new and revised script proly wont be done soon, right? just want to know. not tell you to rush.

One final done, one more to go! then it's packing for Rome~

must do last- minute cramming..


oh yea. what font was that? just curious, if you remember. I like it :3
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PostSubject: Re: Hachimitsu no Kissu Plotting (Private) UPDATED!   Wed Mar 21, 2012 8:17 am

Probably not ; ___;
this is taking more time than I thought
I'll see how much I can actually get done.
I'm on page 15 so far -cry- </3
-WORKS HARDER-

o uo I think the font was....
... wow I actually do not remember
I have it on my main computer though o uo
when I use it again I'll check and see c:
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PostSubject: Re: Hachimitsu no Kissu Plotting (Private) UPDATED!   Wed Mar 21, 2012 10:23 am

no rush, no rush

Guess ill just work on random sketching while waiting for the plane tomorrow
I need to improve some more anyway

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PostSubject: Re: Hachimitsu no Kissu Plotting (Private) UPDATED!   Wed Mar 21, 2012 12:29 pm

On page 25 now : D <3333
ALMOST DONE-ISH I'm toward the end of the chapter now n __n
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PostSubject: Re: Hachimitsu no Kissu Plotting (Private) UPDATED!   Wed Mar 21, 2012 12:55 pm

is there any chance it'll be done in about 5-6 hours? : D its fine if its just a rough draft
*excited*

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PostSubject: Re: Hachimitsu no Kissu Plotting (Private) UPDATED!   Wed Mar 21, 2012 1:00 pm

Yup I can have it done by then for sure! : D <33
i'll link it here when I'm finished c: <3
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PostSubject: Re: Hachimitsu no Kissu Plotting (Private) UPDATED!   Wed Mar 21, 2012 2:25 pm

YESH~! Ill have something to look forward to while everyone else is going out to celebrate our last day in Paris ^^
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PostSubject: Re: Hachimitsu no Kissu Plotting (Private) UPDATED!   Wed Mar 21, 2012 10:29 pm

FUUUUUU-- Sorry I know you're probably asleeep now ; __; but
School totally killed my mojo. I finished the rough draft, might make some changes, might not we'll see~ c:
SO WITHOUT FURTHER WAITING, HERE YOU GO ; __;
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PostSubject: Re: Hachimitsu no Kissu Plotting (Private) UPDATED!   Fri Mar 23, 2012 4:31 am

I think a description of their character like

NAME: MIKAZUKI KISUKE

KIND, HUMBLE, SWEET AND WISE

is a little... well, I dont think Ive seen that before.

Page 4: panel 6: for new student orientation…” Just doesnt seem necessary as it was just said, and I thikn it'd flow better without that last part.
Pg 5, from panel 1 to 2 seems kind of a jump. Maybe insert 1 more panel with her turning to leave, and saying how late she is again?
All the Fact boxes in the orientation can just be said by someone
I think its good that there's so much info, though i doubt anone'd remember, but it shows how overwhelming big the school is and kinda gives a sense of what Umeko's going through


Grammar/spelling
6-2: a hold should be one word
12-2 Plural of freshman-freshmen


Havent finished reading it. need to go to orientation

XD
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PostSubject: Re: Hachimitsu no Kissu Plotting (Private) UPDATED!   Fri Mar 23, 2012 10:59 am

Well, that’s exactly why I put it there to be honest. Going the normal route and having Umeko talk about them/her day and being like “Hi my name is Mikazuki Umeko” just didn’t seem to fit what I was trying to do for this chapter at all. So instead of her saying “My father is humble, kind, sweet and wise”, it just sort of ruined the mood. I guess it doesn’t matter if the traits are there or not but why not make HnK unique? It doesn’t all have to be the same like other manga and it could start some form of trend.

Fixed that new student orientation thingy.
I’ll add in another panel or two to fix the jump.

As for someone just saying all that info, I had it that way before and I ran it by some of my editors and they all just agreed that the fact boxes look better? Apparently most manga just use small little fact boxes instead of dialogue for the sake of saying what needs to be said about the place with efficiency and without taking up any real time.

Ahh typos XD thank you for pointing them out~!
Fixed C: <3

Oh yeah and when you get to it, I have the magic circles for each character all ready to go~ <3
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PostSubject: Re: Hachimitsu no Kissu Plotting (Private) UPDATED!   Fri Mar 23, 2012 11:15 am

uhhhh what? magic circles?

I really like the pacing of the battle scene ;3
Is your friend still thinking of joining?
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PostSubject: Re: Hachimitsu no Kissu Plotting (Private) UPDATED!   Fri Mar 23, 2012 11:22 am

o uo Yeah! Magic circles like this!
i'm pretty sure I gave Heishi Mars one in the battle~ c: So it's all ready to go~ or should be anyways XD I think I have a few more to finish but Mars' will be done by the time we get there.

And I was somewhat worried about the battle > w<
Glad you think the pacing is good! c: I've got some basic ideas for chapter 2
Just not entirely sure what'll be happening just yet.

Also yes! My friend is still joining
Hopefully she'll be posting here soon~
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PostSubject: Re: Hachimitsu no Kissu Plotting (Private) UPDATED!   Fri Mar 23, 2012 11:30 am

Hello there.
I'm the friend that is joining.
You can call me Cherii or Ciara. Whatever you like. C:

Is there anything specific that you need help with since you're the main artist?
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PostSubject: Re: Hachimitsu no Kissu Plotting (Private) UPDATED!   Sat Mar 24, 2012 4:24 am

OOh. magic circles like thaat. gotcha.


hallooooo
Cherii is such a cute nickname X3

uhm... can i just see examples of your works? Well, I know I cant draw the animals in a realistic enough style for sure. uhm... maybe paneling, other stuff... basically everything... XD
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